"You don't want your daughter to be like me." I said to my colleague one day. He peered over and replied "Not like you? You're a successful interventional cardiologist." I am indeed, but it has been difficult to exist in this vortex of a world. I feel as though I have climbed to the top of a mountain of skulls and bones. The road has left me weary. I have been running too long and I cannot breathe. When I look behind me, I see broken dreams and brittle relationships. Is that a mirage? I am unable to lose the criticism, insinuations and bullying. Does anybody see this? My world is a battlefield, and I am not sure if I want to be here. I lay in my bed, trying to find peace in the confusion of how I could be so right and yet also so wrong. In the workplace, I have to be assertive, confident, logical, and fundamentally masculine. In life, I must be warm, patient, nurturing and compassionate. It is hard enough to embody one side or the other - but to strive t...
This is a great sermon and has taught me a fair bit about friendships. The below is an abbreviated transcript, because it has been worded so nicely I really couldn't say it any better than he has. You can't rush relational intimacy. It doesn't happen in a day. Sometimes in the eagerness, because we are so starved for actual people in our life, when anybody shows us any attention, we just come on so strong and lay it on so thick coz we're trying to Amazon Prime the relationship. But when it's just this tiny little thing, you just add tiny little twigs to it and a little bit of kindling to it. You can't get to the big logs right away. That little flame is not enough to take on that big log. So you need friendship kindling and that takes time. There are things in society today that have made it harder for us to develop friendships. There is an increased ease of movement. Where in the past, you would have lived and died in a similar location, these days, you can tak...
This comes from a great video I watched recently. It is linked below and I found it very insightful. There are Four Basic Negative Emotions in all people. - Anger (amygdala) - Disgust (insula) --> something that will hurt you. telling you that you should avoid it. It is biologically directed towards pathogens, but politicians use this to control people. Eg Wuhan virus, or republicans vs democrats - Sadness (dorsal anterior singular cortex) --> stems from losing something or someone you love - Fear (amygdala) Negative does not mean bad. It means these are the things that signal threat to us, from the outside world. Contempt is a combination of two negative emotions - Anger and Disgust When you express contempt / disgust, it is interpreted by the brain of your partner as "you think I'm a pathogen, and I need to be cast out". Even if you dont mean it. So dont roll your eyes, dont be sarcastic. When you are feeling that coldness that comes with Contempt, that is when ...
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