Phileosophie

It's been about 3 years since the internship situation started. My life is settling back into a cheerful rhythm and I've recently worked some things out that have been dragging on for a while. I guess at this point what I really want to say is: God, Thank you for staying around when I was bitter Thank you for being there when I was feeling sorry for myself Thank you for not making me feel sorry when I challenged you to perform miracles Thank you for allowing me to grow, even if just a little Please give me eyes to see things fresh and new Give me a heart that is filled with peace Give me the wisdom to work through the tangles Guide my attention to what really matters Help me to see others as you see them Help me reflect something of your love for humanity Give me perserverance to walk the path I have before me Let me find rest and joy in your presence. And now, here's a little clip by Victor King and Andrew Garcia . Good men.  

I would so much rather be working the day shift this week. Three of my favourite medical students are on the ward during the day. Instead, I am stuck doing nights with someone who has been making it a point to make my life a little nastier whenever he sees me. I'm not talking about my own reg, just someone I have the misfortune of having to refer patients to. We did a term together some time back. It was all going swimmingly. In fact, I'd noticed that he was texting me at odd times, like when I was on holiday to ask if I was having fun or to say hello and stuff. He was always also inviting me out for dinner which I didn't put too much thought into because he has a long term girlfriend back in his country of origin. But on the last day of my term, something really strange happened. He started yelling at me and threatening me, saying that I had pointed at his face and thereby (going by his culture) had cursed his parents. Another registrar was in the room, an Aussie bloke...

This is a short clip I shot of Mahon Pool which is behind my house in Sydney. I love coming here because it is such a wonderful place (imagine it with a little breeze and the smell of salt water).. it wasn't actually as overcast as the video makes it seem, and the thundering you might hear is actually the sea roaring as it surges to the shore. God has been good to me. I am ever thankful for the opportunity to live my life in Sydney.

"No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." -Hebrews 12:11

It has been a good year. I have had some time to think about where my life is heading and where I want it to go. Today someone sent me this question:  " If you could do absolutely anything you wanted, regardless of money, stability, or anything else.. what would it be? " After giving it some thought, I'd say I want to volunteer. I want to help those who do not have access to help. I want to offer hope to the disadvantaged. I want to make the world a better place. I want to contribute to cardiology. I want to help it advance as a field. I want to meet people from all walks of life. I want to learn from them. I want to hear about their lives. I want to find purpose in mine. I want to make a difference. Of late, I've had Cambodia on my heart. I have never been there, but I've been hearing a lot about it from friends who have. I want to go there and see this place for myself. And to give something to this community. I want to love them, and gain some perspective. ...

Today was one of those days when it just feels amazing to be a doctor. I had my first peritonitic abdomen and immediately requested consultant assistance and a surgical review. The patient was seen by the surg reg within 10 minutes of arriving at the hospital! Those of you who have spent time in an ED waiting room will know that's pretty awesome. All my patients thanked me today - all told me I'd helped them and my bosses seemed happy too. It feels great when your medical training seems to finally be producing good results. Left work feeling quite elated. (Also did my first speculum exam as a doctor today!!! Heaps fun. Last time I did it was on a practice patient who did not require an exam so it was awesome to do it for realsies this time.)

This trial was ongoing when I was a student at Mount Sinai Heart. Interesting results showing that CABG has superior results to PCI for diabetic patients with multivessel coronary artery disease.